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kradical July 30 2014, 04:25

I am the stinkburger chef!

So I was toodling around on Amazon looking at reviews, which is sometimes edifying -- but often not. Witness a one-star review of V-Wars by E. Lee Zimmerman, a.k.a. Trekscribbler, a.k.a. Ed, in which he trashed the anthology overall, including this particular bit:
… but when your go-to-roster includes stinkburger chef Keith R.A. Decandido in the line-up it’s pretty clear you’re reaching for mediocrity more so than greatness.

I would like to hereby request that all my publishers henceforth use the byline "Stinkburger Chef Keith R.A. DeCandido" as my byline....

We've already had a grand old time on Facebook and Twitter regarding Mr. Zimmerman's neologism, and one friend is trying to convince me to create a fan page on Facebook, and I'm actually considering it.

I also know that this is going to be a thing at Shore Leave this weekend -- especially given that David Mack, Dayton Ward, and Kevin Dilmore are going to be there. Hell, I've had four different fans request that I sign their books with "Stinkburger Chef" as part of the autograph.....

Mr. Zimmerman reviews quite a bit on Amazon -- over 1100 reviews going back to 1999 -- but the only other one of my books he's reviewed is Dragon Precinct, which he gave two stars and said at one point:
DeCandido (and others) has done a scholar's work in sinking the "Star Trek" franchise into the worst level of vanity publishing

Love it. :)

Thanks, Mr. Zimmerman -- or perhaps I can call you Ed? It's been a shitty couple of days for me and Wrenn, but this cheered me right up.

yours, sincerely,
---the Stinkburger Chef
kradical July 29 2014, 19:24

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Rewatch: "In the Cards"

The hunt for a Willie Mays rookie card turns into a station-wide crisis with the Dominion that could lead to war. Or, y'know, not. The DS9 Rewatch succumbs to the soulless minions of orthodoxy with "In the Cards."

An excerpt:
Giger’s theory is that cells need to be excited and entertained so they won’t die of ennui. For some inexplicable reason, he has been unable to gain traction with this theory among the greater scientific community.
kradical July 28 2014, 03:19

final table of contents for Without a License

Later this year, Dark Quest Books will be publishing Without a License: The Fantastic Worlds of Keith R.A. DeCandido, a collection of my short fiction. I've finalized the table of contents, and here's what's gonna be in it:

"Partners in Crime" (a new Dragon Precinct story written for this collection)
"The Ballad of Big Charlie" (originally published in V-Wars, part of the shared-world series created by Jonathan Maberry)
"A Vampire and a Vampire Hunter Walk Into a Bar" (originally published in Amazing Stories #608)
"Under the King's Bridge" (originally published in Liar Liar)
"The Stone of the First High Pontiff" (originally published in Defending the Future: Best-Laid Plans)
"Seven-Mile Race" (a new Cassie Zukav story written for this collection)
"Editorial Interference" (originally published in Fedoras Literary Review Volume 1, #2)
"Sunday in the Park with Spot" (originally published in Furry Fantastic)
"Wild Bill Got Shot" (previously unpublished, written as part of "Two Beers and a Story" at Noreascon in 2004)
"-30-" (originally published as part of the Viral novella series, created by Steven Savile)
"Behold a White Tricycle" (previously unpublished, written for the never-actually-published 44 Clowns: 11 Stories of the 4 Clowns of the Apocalypse anthology)

Not sure of the exact release date for this yet, but I'm looking at the possibility of throwing a release party for it at Arisia in January. We'll see.....
kradical July 26 2014, 04:49

I'm a Scribe Award loser again!

For the sixth time, I have not won the Scribe Award, in this case losing out on Best Original Non-Speculative Novel for Leverage: The Zoo Job to Greg Cox and Hy Conrad, who were tied for victory in that category. Greg had the other Leverage novel on the docket, The Bestseller Job, and Hy wrote Mr. Monk Helps Himself.

Dunno who the other winners were yet, but I'm sure they'll be available soon......
kradical July 25 2014, 19:04

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Rewatch: "Empok Nor"

O'Brien, Garak, Nog, and four redshirts go to DS9's sister station to scrounge for spare parts and find two psychotic Cardassians. Guess which four don't survive. Go on. Guess. The DS9 Rewatch travels to "Empok Nor."

An excerpt:
This is made worse by the climax, in which we’re supposed to believe that Garak, who has been sufficiently taken over by this psychotropic drug that he enjoys killing the first Cardassian soldier, gleefully pursues the second, and has no trouble whatsoever killing Amaro, will suddenly decide not to kill Nog. We’ve seen this before, notably in “The Adversary” and “Shattered Mirror,” where regulars are put in danger and survive it for no other reason than the actor has a contract to continue appearing on the show. Sure, it’s ostensibly in order to manipulate O’Brien, but this version of Garak doesn’t do manipulation, he’s a psychopath who wants to kill people a whole lot.
kradical July 25 2014, 17:10

I'll be at the Highland Library Comic Con tomorrow!

The Highland Library in Highland, New York (near Poughkeepsie) is holding their first-ever comic convention tomorrow from 10am to 4pm. I'm one of the guests, along with authors Linda Zimmerman and C.L. Schneider, comics writer Todd Dezago, cartoonist Roger L. Phillips, and makeup effects artist Danielle Masterson, as well as a dozen local cartoonists and various fan clubs. So come on by! I'll have a table, where I'll be selling and autographing books and answering whatever silly questions you might have for me.....
kradical July 24 2014, 19:23

throwback Thursday

Me and the late David Honigsberg at a solo gig of David's (with me backing him up on percussion) at the Baggot Inn, ca. 2001 or so.

kradical July 23 2014, 21:12

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Rewatch: "Blaze of Glory"

Eddington's back -- and he may be the only Maquis left... The DS9 Rewatch goes out in a "Blaze of Glory."

An excerpt:
In this episode, the final nail in the Maquis’s coffin is Eddington’s hubris. He never imagined that his plan to have the Maquis declare their independence and become a sovereign nation could have failed. He never imagined that the Cardassians would be strong enough to fight back. He never imagined having to deal with the Jem’Hadar or that if he did, that they would find Athos IV (given that he was DS9’s security chief going back to first contact with the Dominion, he really should have known better).
kradical July 22 2014, 15:42

The Chronic Rift In Review: I am the Master and you will obey me....

For the first time in waaaaaay too long, there's a new In Review episode of The Chronic Rift! Join me, John S. Drew, Krissy Myers, and Michael Falkner as we discuss John's shiny new Master's Degree, my new Dragon Precinct Kickstarter, the release of Scanners and Jodorowsky's Dune on DVD, and Michael's Doctor Whoblogging.

Plus reviews!
    "The Multiplex at the End of the Universe" -- Dan reviews Coherence as well as Star Trek in comic book and fan film form.
    "Pod People" -- John does a roundup of TV-related podcasts, including Mission Log: A Roddenberry Podcast, Bigger on the Inside, The M*A*S*H 4077 Podcast, The Quantum Leap Podcast, and The seaQuest Podcast.
    "Couch Potato Salad" -- I do a roundup of Dominion, Fargo, Justified, Rake, Killer Women, Murder in the First, and Sirens

And we close with "Pop Tops." Check it out!

The episode is available on iTunes or the Rift web site. Comments can be left at the Rift forums or the Rift Facebook page, via e-mail to john at chronicrift dot com, or by phone at 888-866-9010. Follow us on Twitter @chronic_rift.
kradical July 19 2014, 15:12

playing tourist/tourguide

My dear friend Jenn is in town and I've been wandering the city with her since she got here. We've covered Penn Station, Katz's Deli, the Delancey, Central Park, and Professor Thom's, and yesterday we went to Coney Island, the New York Aquarium, and Lombardi's.

Wrenn and I were as much tourists at Coney Island as Jenn was, and we were lead around by our friends Emily and Paul, who live nearby. I hadn't been to CI since I was a wee tot (and neither Wrenn nor Jenn had ever been), and I'm really gratified to see how much the area has revived since its not-so-long-ago days as a run-down dump. Wrenn and I even rode on the Thunderbolt, which was great fun, and we revived our desire to some day go to an amusement park and spend the day on stomach-destroying roller-coaster rides. :)

After wandering the boardwalk, taking pictures, riding the carousel, and eating at Nathan's, Emily and Paul left us to the Aquarium, which is still being rebuilt following Sandy, but which has lots of neat stuff including two walruses (Jenn had never seen a walrus in person), penguins (whom we saw fed), and a superb sealion show.

Then we headed to Lombardi's, so Jenn could experience the first pizza place in NYC, and after Wrenn stopped at Rice to Riches for rice pudding, we went home and collapsed.

Today I'm taking her to the Brooklyn Bridge and South Street Seaport, and possibly Chinatown, then we're going to see my former Boogie Knights bandmate Heather Bagnall in SingleMarriedGirl at the Spiral Theatre.
kradical July 19 2014, 03:41

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Rewatch: "Children of Time"

The crew of the Defiant meets their own descendants and has to figure out whether or not to kill them. Some hard choices as the DS9 Rewatch meets the "Children of Time."

An excerpt:
The discussion over what to do after Kira announces that she’s okay with sacrificing herself is an excellent one, the strongest of its type since the Prime Directive colloquy in Picard’s quarters in TNG’s “Pen Pals.” Everyone in the room has a legitimate point, the question isn’t as simple as Kira’s belief in destiny or O’Brien’s (completely understandable) rigidity, and the discussion is an excellent one.
kradical July 17 2014, 15:41

random Wednesday is random

Yesterday started with me going to the Chapin School on the upper east side of Manhattan, which is hosting the i2 summer camp, which is filled with intensive one-week workshops for kids on various subjects, and one of them is writing science fiction. I came in for 90 minutes yesterday to talk to one group of fifth and sixth graders so they could get the perspective of a working SF writer on the business and the craft and such. I did a lot of my usual spiels about writing, only slightly simplified for the audience (I'm used to dealing with kids that age at the dojo, and I've also found that talking to them like people rather than kids is more effective). It went swimmingly, and I'm doing it again for a group of seventh and eighth graders next week. Thanks to the mighty Jaym Gates and Marilyn Doerr for setting it up.)

After that, following a detour to check the PO box (which just had some junk mail, sigh), I went down to Quest Diagnostics to get my blood drained as part of my most recent physical to make sure that my thyroid and cholesterol are still under control from the meds and to make sure there's nothing else wrong with me. Then I got some desperately needed food, since I hadn't eaten all day (because I was having my blood drained), and generally hung out in the vicinity of Penn Station waiting for my friend Jenn's train to arrive. While doing so, I worked on a tie-in novel proposal, which I actually finished and turned in yesterday.

Jenn is in visiting from Virginia for a week. After I fed her some lunch, we headed home to drop off luggage and relax and for Jenn and Scooter to re-bond (everyone loves Scooter and Scooter loves everyone, and he's particularly fond of Jenn).

Then we hied down to the lower east side. First we had dinner at Katz's Deli. Jenn was last here at Passover, so the opportunity for a proper Jewish deli didn't present itself. After consuming yummy sandwiches and Dr. Brown's sodas, we went to the Delancey, which has a free burlesque show every Wednesday night. Our roommate Dale is a regular at this show, and Wrenn and I have gone along a couple times, and the three of us took Jenn down last night. There are three sets, bridged by a go-go dancer (last night the host was Runaround Sue and the go-go dancer was Lucille Ti Amore). They also do audience participation thingies, and I got drafted for one of them, in which each contestant gets down on their knees and has to drink a beer from between either Sue's or Lucille's legs. I got Lucille who is, uh, very short. The angle was all wrong, and I wound up with a lot of beer on my shirt.

Despite this, we had a grand old time, the dancers were excellent (though one performer had overdone the glitter just a tad), and I was all set to enter a wet t-shirt contest. Jenn and Sue also got to talking and realized they're both from the same city in Virginia. Because of course in a lower-east-side bar, you'd bump into someone from the same town four states away.....

So in summary: I guest-lecutred on writing to ten-year-olds, I got my blood drained, I welcomed a friend back to NYC, I wrote a novel proposal, I ate a yummy pastrami sandwich, and I got beer spilled on me by a go-go dancer.

How was your day? *laughs*

Today, Jenn and I are spending the day in Central Park, then we're off to meet Wrenn at the Tor.com sixth anniversary party at Professor Thom's on Second Avenue.
joking posted to animorphs July 15 2014, 19:50

Animorphs: "The Word of Your Body" (1/1)

Title: The Word of Your Body
Author: [personal profile] joking
Characters: Main six, Berensons, Aftran, Temrash
Pairings: Rachel/Marco, implied one-sided David/Rachel
Rating: Adult (for disturbing themes, not gore or sexuality)
Warnings: (skip) Transphobia, dysphoria, bullying, intersex genital mutilation, body hatred, slurs, misgendering, stalking
Beta: </a></b></a>lit_luminary
Summary: In a world where the Animorphs are all transgender or intersex, it isn't the ability to morph that makes all the difference; it's having comrades who can see them for who they truly are.
Notes: This fic attempts to faithfully represent what it might be like to be a transgender kid in the 90s, when Animorphs is set. As such, the kids describe themselves in terms that could be considered offensive today, but were probably all that would have been available to them.

Read on AO3, comment here or there.
poparena posted to animorphs July 15 2014, 02:45

Opinionated Animorphs Book Guide - #39 The Hidden

Time to look at what many consider the worst book in the series. The morphing cube is running amok, and now the dreaded BUFFAHUMAN is loose!

You can watch it on one big piece on Blip here:

or you can watch it in two pieces below the cut.

Read more...Collapse )
joking posted to animorphs July 14 2014, 00:50

Animorphs/HDM: "Love the Warrior" (4/6)

Title: Carry On Wayward Son
Characters: Tobias, Ax, Toby, Loren, ensemble
Rating: All Ages
Warnings: (skip) Ableism, graphic violence
Beta: lit_luminary
Summary: Tobias joined the war because he had nothing else. Now, he has a true reason to fight. A retelling of #23: The Pretender.
To new readers: This is part of my Dæmorphing series, a fusion of Animorphs with His Dark Materials. If you're new to the 'verse or don't know HDM, refer to this primer.

Read on AO3. Feel free to comment here or there.

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